I have come to realize that it doesn't matter if things are not perfect. If things do not go as planned. If you would have talked to me a year and a half ago I could have told you my goals step by step and how things were going to go exactly as the personal road map I wrote for myself. Now a days I have goals, but I have realized to no longer set step by step goals. Life changes and we never have complete control over our lives.
A little over a year ago my life changed something unexpected happened. Something that was out of my control. I was hurt by someone that I once loved. I never for saw in my wildest dreams what happened to ever happen to me. Because of what happened I spent the last year trying to figure out why. Figure out how I could have changed things.The truth is I cannot change it so therefore I must live with it and my life is far from over so I might as well make my life worth it.
I have tried so hard to always be strong to always try to show every one that it doesn't define me. Honestly it does, but not for the reasons some may think. I have found myself. I have been able to figure out that it doesn't matter if things do not go as I originally plan it to. Now I no longer let others define me. I once let someone control my thoughts and actions. I vow to always have my own voice now. I am not afraid to stick up for myself anymore. I am who I am and there is no reason to change. To those who read this blog or those who may, I do not wish what happened to me upon anyone ever, but I do wish that you will find yourself.
Some nights I do not sleep, other times I find myself staying in bed for half the day. It is part of the healing process. I have struggled through depression. I am sure I will from time to time struggle through it again, but as I have named this blog Trust Your Struggles Always I truly mean it. If it was not for my struggles I do not know where I would be or who I would be. Life really does throw you lemons. I could have let this accident tear me down and keep me down, but I do not plan to.I will not let it though.
I hate looking weak to those around me and although I may not show it often I am weak from time to time, but how could I ever become strong with out having weakness? I cry. I cry more than I ever have in my life. Sometimes I do not even fully understand why I do. After I finish I realize that I feel so much better. I look at some inspirational quotes, look at myself in the mirror and tell myself. It is okay. Cry, show weakness people are not going to look at me negatively just because I have weaknesses.
For all the people who may be reading this. You are worth so much. You are you and that's what matters. Do not let anyone change you into someone you are not. Try to find yourself try to be the best you can be. Do not let failure keep you down. Some of the most successful people in the world have failed numerous times. Never try to be someone you aren't.
I want those who read this to know that Violence from a partner or Ex partner is never acceptable both emotionally or physically. If you know someone who is going through domestic violence or violence do not be afraid to talk to the victims about it or contact a help hotline. Or send them to nomore.org
Now that I have stayed up all night and possibly ranted a lot I will end this post with another quote.
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